The Bachelorette: Rachel “Left Eye” Lindsay

Sorry for the delay in getting this post up!  So, let’s just dig right in, shall we?

We open right back up where we left off last week; Paulie holding DeMario back from the gate, & Chris Harrison finally doing some real work – holding the guys back so that Rachel can have a private(ish) conversation with DeMario.  His character was assassinated – not to self don’t try to use that kind of talk with a lawyer.  Rachel told him, “I need a man, & what I saw was a boy.”  She sent him home again.

Cocktail Party Continues:
Blake is apparently in love with Lucas & stands over his bed, eating bananas, as told to Rachel by WhaBoom.  This is obviously a lie because Blake is on a Ketogenic diet & doesn’t eat carbs.  Lucas & Blake are so annoying.

Luckily for us, Rachel sends them both home to save our weary souls.

Men left standing after the Rose Ceremony: First Rose Ceremony

Afterwards, Blake & Lucas have the dumbest fake fight.  Seemed real rehearsed to me.

Group Date 1: Bryan, Jonathan, Peter, Alex, Will, Fred
Date Card: Lights, Camera, Action

They went on the Ellen Show.  Rachel claims Ellen is her spirit animal.  The guys strip, why again?  Alex twerked.  What the hell were those pants? Group Date 1

The guys played Never Have I Ever on Ellen.  Alex said something weird about Rachel looking him in the eye, left eye to left eye.  I found a few interesting articles regarding eye contact…you can check them out here & here.

Fred is so sweet, but kind of a sad sack Eeyore.  Three of the six guys kissed Rachel, which made Fred insecure.   He finally kissed her & it was the most awkward…and loud, very smack-y.  Rachel said she felt like she was kissing a boy.  She couldn’t get “bad Freddy” out of her mind.  Rachel did the only decent thing she could & sent Fred home…while holding the Group Date rose, which was kinda cruel.  Alex got the group date rose.

1-on-1 Date: Anthony
Date Card: Meet Me at the Rodeo

They went horseback riding on Rodeo Dr.  They rode their horses into a store to get boots with the spurs, big buckles, & cowboy hats.  This is not the OK Corral, it’s more like the Not Okay Corral.  Anthony's Date

As much as I like Anthony, this date was boring.  Anthony got the rose.

Group Date 2: Brady, Dean, Adam, Kenny, Bryce, Lee, Jack, Eric
Date Card: Sometimes in Relationships, Women Have to Take Charge

Waiting for the group date, Eric’s insecurity is showing.  He attacked Iggy, though a producer Iggy egged him on.

Rachel’s girls from last season showed up & planned the date – Raven, Jasmine, Corinne, & Alexis.  Rachel said “my girls” 11, 234, 987 times…I counted.  I was so uncomfortable with this date.  Mud wrestling.  Bryce won, beating poor, tired Kenny.  Not going to lie, for most of this date I was hiding behind my laptop laughing hysterically…similar to how I behave in front of strippers. group 2

Surprisingly, Eric got the group date rose.

Cocktail Party:
Iggy questions Eric’s fit for Rachel…to Rachel.  Iggy is the Evan of this season.  Lee talks shit about Eric screaming at Iggy.   Okay, so based on Lee’s social media, we learned this past week that he is racist…unapologetically.  But, is he not an equal opportunity racist?  He has a problem with Eric, but not Iggy.  Looks like he’ll have more issues with Will & Josiah (or was it Kenny?).

To Be Continued…

There were a lot of fantastic Tweets from the night; these were my faves: E3.1E3.2E3.3E3.4E3.5E3.6E3.7E3.8E3.9

I hate when we don’t get a rose ceremony, it really throws off my bracket picks.  Who are we loving?  We obviously hate Lee & Tickle Monster, right?

Until next week…

Kiss Hug,

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